Crisis of Faith
Nineteenth Sunday - Year B
1 Kings 19:4-8; Ephesians 4:30-5:2; John 6:41-51
Elijah wants to die. His depression is due to a feeling of defeat: the mission among his people seems not successful. How many priests and missionaries can identify with Elijah. Years of pastoral work and many sacrifices did not bring much fruit. "This is enough, O LORD! Take my life, for I am not as good as my fathers in faith" (1 Kings 19:4 - I prefer this translation of this verse).
Elijah is not the only person in the Bible wishing for death. Prophet Jonah (Jonah 4:3), old Tobit (Tobit 3:6), and young Sara (Tobit 3:13), also ask God that He would take their lives. However, none of them decided to end their lives by themselves. Being the people of faith they understand that life is a gift of God and only God has the right to take it back.
“I am not as good as my fathers in faith". Elijah’s greatest father in faith was Moses, and Horeb was God’s mountain. At Horeb God revealed Himself to Moses and gave him the Ten Commandments. Elijah goes on a retreat, to draw strength from the spiritual source of his nation. There he realized the truth that God is forever faithful. The Bible retells the great works of God that took place in the past to strengthen our faith. What God did in the past, He does in the present and shall do in the future (see Heb. 13:8).
The crisis of faith is also present in today's gospel. The Jews were unable to look at Jesus with the eyes of faith. How could Jesus, the son of Joseph, say that He came down from heaven? (John 6:41). The Gospel helps us to realizes that faith in Jesus is the gift of the Father. "No one can come to me, unless the Father, who sent me draw him" (John 6:44).
What about those who are not drawn to Jesus by the Father? After all, we all have turned away from God. Why then, certain people are drawn and certain are not? “Whom He [God] draws and whom He does not draw, why He draws one and does not draw another, do not desire to judge if you do not wish to err. But accept and understand: If you are not yet drawn, then pray that you may be drawn” (Saint Augustine). It all depends on the pleasure of God’s will.
“Yet they rebelled and grieved the Holy Spirit "(Is. 63:10), said Isaiah about the people of Israel. Saint Paul warns us not to imitate that bad example. We have received the Holy Spirit as the pledge of our redemption and we are called to imitate God. What does this mean in practice? God in Christ has forgiven us, we should also forgive others. Christ loved us till the cross, we should also love in this way (Eph. 4:32; 5:2).
“Get up and eat". The meal provided by an angel strengthened Elijah on his forty-day journey to Horeb. The Eucharist, the bread of life, strengthens us on our pilgrimage to eternity. When we experience the crisis of faith we should not despair. We should also “get up and eat” the living bread - come to the Eucharistic table - because “whoever eats this bread will live forever” (John 6:51).